Top Posts of Year

Blogger collects very basic statistics on which posts are popular on your blog. So with the year coming to an end here are the two five posts in order for 2011:

1. Lucy Turns Four
2. Christmas Day
3. Lucy Moving
4. Date Confirmed
5. What a Mess

I was a bit suppressed that none of the other posts, other than the family posts made it into the top five. I would have thought at least one of music post might have made it which seemed popular the year before.

Year of Contrasts

In the final moments of 2011 it is a time to look back at the year gone by. Like all years it had it highs and lows and it has been be full of contrasting emotions and frustrations mixed with times of happiness and contentment.

The low points there was Lucy moving, the loss of access that caused and the extra expense that has caused then there was the feeling of melancholy over Christmas and the general feeling of being cut out of Lucy's life for the last six months, to the extent I don't know who her doctor is or even what nursery she goes too. It is not the life I wanted, made or planned for her. I just hope things get better in the new year and there is not more hurt and pain coming my way.

The times have been at there best when I have the people I love around me and we are able to get out and about. All the trips I have made to the local parks with Lucy and with Emily and Catherine. Seeing Catherine on stage at last in the year six school play before she left to go to secondary school. Taking Emily and Catherine to Duxford to see the aeroplanes at the there and taking them all to gokidsgo! Leicester and riding on the bumper cars with Lucy. Then there was a weekend in June, before Lucy's mummy moved, when we went to a toy exhibition, played in the park and watched a local polo match at the polo field in the warm summer sun. That was one of those days in the summer when the world seemed beautiful. The moments like that have been truly wonderful. Then there is all the other smaller trips out like seeing the trains in the spring sunshine and sitting around Rutland water during a autumn heatwave. All fun. There are just too many moments to mention. I have had some amazing times with everyone.

Then there are the moments of just natural beauty that surround where I live. The picturesque countryside as it changes from one session to another. The magnificent sunsets and sunrises a few of which have been outstanding. The variety of wildlife we have seen on our travels, especially bird life which have included sightings of peregrine falcons, barn owls, little owls, sparrow hawks, kestrels and countless types of small birds some of which I have never seen before. It has been really a great year in many ways and this is enhanced when I see some of the wildlife with the girls.

Finally there are my friends and the people that have been there for me and sometimes I have been there for in return. Those that have been understanding and supported me. To them I want to say a big thank you. 

For the coming year I hope it is going to be full of happiness. I pray that I will get to see more of Lucy before she goes to school in the autumn so the girls can have more time together. I don't want more lows like I have had this year, Lucy's mummy moving hit me hard. I can do without the hurt and the pain that they have brought me. I need to repair my soul and not have it broken any more. I could do with the promises of the past being fulfilled and it being filled understanding, but most of all I want it to be a year I can say, this time next year, has been one of the best in years.

The Good Things

Recently the blog has been either rather thoughtful or negative in outlook and may be it is time to address this. The things that get written about are just frustrating and sometimes hurtful and I tend get the out in the open and out of my system. There are things, however, that give me great  joy in life.

There is the place I live. I can't think of many places more beautiful and rural than Rutland. It is a lovely place with it small towns and villages and the people, who on the whole, are friendly and welcoming. The countryside and the reservoirs are stunting and the amount of wildlife that can be seen is truly amazing. Then there is my family, the people I care about past and present that have touched my life so much and mean so much and the friends I have that are so dear to me that are always there for me when I need them. It is things like this that are good in life and there are so many of them. I will give anything for those people and things I care for.

Frustrations and Life

Life at times can be very frustrating. That is how I feel about things at them moment. In some of the things I want from life I feel like I am banging my head against a brick wall. This can range from finding a job in a sector where the jobs have dried up, living on little money, getting a very simple message across or general lack of communication. All these things can be frustrating.

We live in a society that promotes instant gratification of our needs though the media. It presents us with dreams and we go off chasing them and demanding they be ours. We want constant happiness in relationships and life, but this is far from reality. Everyone experiences highs, lows and contentment inbetween and there are no quick fixes for the lows. Nothing or nobody is perfect and at times we have to wait for what we want or work towards it. All this can lead to a feeling of frustration. It is in built in us. You just have to look at a young child to see that. 

Frustration is the one thing I know I am bad at handling times, but I'm having to learn to deal with it everyday at the moment. I sometimes store up the feelings it produces, until I let them go, normally in a rush. Some of frustration comes from within, like not being able to speak ones ones mind or be listened to with empathy, others times it comes from external sources you can do little about, like the job market at the moment or other peoples anger or insecurities. It is all hard to handle at times especially when you have something important you want or want to get across or do. What I am finding I have to learn is not to let things get to me and to have patience and stick with things I believe in and never give up hope.

Today has been a frustrating day and plans have gone wrong, but tomorrow is another day and those plans can move forward then. Life in many way is the same, as long as you don't give in and keep faith, one day things might work out fine in the end. Never burn bridges and keep an open mind is one thing I always do. The frustrations of today are like the traffic jams of life. You just have to sit them out and even if you take a detour you will get to your destination in the end. The only question is will you like what you find when you get there?

All I know about life is that great things can come from loving the people that you care about. Giving to them without being selfish just because of how you feel about them and in return taking what they offer back without having to demand anything back for what you give. At times this is frustrating, and when it is, you just have to sit it out knowing that one day you might be reward in return, and if you don't at least you can say you tried. 

The Quiet Descends

Today saw the last of the girls go away to their mums. I dropped Emily and Catherine off at the services on the A1. They were so excited as they have another set of presents to open and their is more fun to be had. I just hope they have a lovely time.

With all the children gone the house has fallen deafly silent. Gone is the laughter and the giggling and all the noise. I'm not sure I like this kind of quiet. I much prefer the children being around and making the house feel alive. It not something I expected that would ever happen a few years ago until Lucy grew up, and now it is a reality. What makes this worse is the time of year, but what can I do about that. It not the sort of thing you get use to, it just something you have to endure. It times like this I just want to get away from the house, the troubles, problems and the memories.

It goes without saying I can't wait to have all the girls together. It won't be as soon as I would have liked it. I did what to have Lucy with the girls next week, but I understand all too well the reasons why I can't, she is a very special little girl that lots of people love.

Bank Holiday Tuesday

Another day with girls together, and the longest period I have had them together in a row for an age. Unfortunately it was the last of the days but that couldn't be helped. Just the way it is and not something I wanted. All the same I wanted to try and enjoy the remaining time after all that I have been feeling over the holidays so far.

The morning for me started when I woke up to find it still dark. I tried getting back to sleep but without success. In the end as the light started to shine through the curtains and I got out of bed and headed for the toilet. Lucy must have heard me moving about and I found her smiling on the landing. We both gathered her things and headed down the stairs. She climbed into my chair and I turned on the television to amuse her while I made her a tea and myself a coffee. We just sat together and watched television until we were both awake.

Some half an hour after our drinks and breakfast Lucy began to play. Bringing her toys in from the family room. We played all kinds of games. This went on until it was time to get Emily and Catherine out of bed. The method she employed today was rather different from normal. In one of the Christmas crackers from the night before she had found a whistle and so with great enthusiasm she went up to their room and blew it as loud as she could. Not quite as nice being joined by Lucy in the bed, but it had the same effect and soon they both joined her for what remained of the morning.

Before lunch we had to pop to the shops to get some essential supplies. So we set out for the supermarket before returning home to make lunch. While we were there Lucy picked a couple of presents and some sweets to take home for  her other sister to enjoy. The presents being for her mummy and other sister, with money being short the presents were small. Along the way we dropped off Emily to her friends Millie for the afternoon, needless to say when Lucy found out where Emily was going she wanted to go too.

After lunch, and the wrapping of the presents we had bought, there was a little bit of time left for Lucy and Catherine play together before the rush began. I had washed Lucy's things that were going back to her mummies in the morning so all there was left to do was make sure Lucy was clean too. As always we left it to the last hour she was here so we could have as much fun as possible. Catherine helped bath her today and dried her hair for me as i got her bits together and packed her bag. Today she wanted to take her whistle with her she got in a Christmas cracker, but somehow she had managed to lose it. Probably a good thing for her mummy's ears as she loved blowing it as loud as she could. Finally the time ran out and we set off out the door.

I wasn't looking forward to dropping Lucy off, I was enjoying her being here with her sisters too much, it lightened my mood. The drive back was very very quiet. So quiet that Lucy drifted off to sleep during the drive. It was probably for the best. It wasn't a drive I wanted to make or a place I wanted to go to, but soon we arrived and soon Lucy was gone. I really don't like that she has to live in a city. It not something I think anyone one wanted for her.

On the way home I picked up Emily to bring her home for dinner which was just something easy to cook. I was all cooked out from the days before and the events of the holidays, the general lack of sleep at the moment, and my mood, had made me very tired. The girls didn't seem to mind as long as their hungry tummies were full, which was a good thing considering how I felt.

For the rest of the evening everyone just relaxed and did there own thing until bedtime. The house seemed much quieter without Lucy about, but not as quiet as it will be after tomorrow when all the girls are gone.

The effects of the feeling that hit me on Christmas day really changed the holiday for me, but thankfully for the girls fun continued despite my mood. I know Lucy really enjoyed Christmas day and wanted Santa to come again on Boxing day. As for the older girls they had a smashing time too. It is the girls that matter at the end of the day. I was just so glad I didn't spoil it for them.

Boxing Day

The day after Christmas always seems quiet. It was that way when I was a child and it still seems to be the same as an adult. I just guess after the excitement of the day before it always makes it seems a bit dull. It is just one of those things that doesn't change no matter what you do on the day or what age you are.

What was nice this morning was to wake up to be greeted by Lucy on the landing. She must have heard me get up and it wasn't long until she was passing me all her stuff to take downstairs. It wasn't long after that, I made coffee and juice for Lucy and soon she was sitting on my lap having a cuddle as we woke up. I had a lovely hour or more with her on my own before Catherine joined us. It was a nice and we played with her fishing game and her other new toys. It was a fine way to start the day. Once Catherine was with us Lucy went off to play with her before she eventually going up to get Emily out of bed to join them. She did this in her usual style by bouncing on her bed until Emily gave in and got up. Then they all played until lunch time in the family room.

Lunch was a simple affair. We had sandwiches and sausage rolls and for the very hungry their were a selection of crisps to chose from. The plan, was to have the main meal in the evening, and that was the plan we were following. I didn't want to spend the morning cooking like I had the day before. Originally we were going to make fresh bread for the sandwiches, but in the end we had enough bread from the day before.

The afternoon was spent playing games between watching television and some computer time for the older girls. The games Lucy got for Christmas were a big hit with everyone and lots of laughter could be heard from the family room with the occasional shouts of "cheat". However, the games were played in good heart and they were all cheating as much as each other. I wasn't in the mood for joining in, but it was pleasant to know that they were still having fun and there were no shouts of "I'm bored".

For dinner we had another roast. This time it was a roast chicken with herbs, roast potatoes, sessional vegetables with stuffing and sausages wrapped in bacon. It was good to sit down with everyone and it what turned out to be a lovely meal. I wasn't hungry but the chicken I did eat it was moist and succulent and with full tummies the girls went off to play.

The evening was much like the afternoon, but with a little more of watching films on the television than playing games. This took them nicely up Lucy's bedtime and like a dream Lucy went up to bed, after stories., kisses and cuddles she fell asleep. This left Emily and Catherine some time before they joined her in the land of nod to watch some of their programmes. With the girls all in bed quiet descended over the house.

Has it been a good day?, well the answer to that is a little complicated. The girls  had a good day, which is the main thing, but for me I just felt tired, down and moody. I hadn't slept well at all the night before. It wasn't how I wanted to feel, just how it was. I just hope I can enjoy the last day Lucy is here more than I did today. It will be the last time the girls are together during the holiday and I want it to be special. Lucy goes back to her mummy's tomorrow and then Emily and Catherine are off to their mums the following day. All I know is Christmas, so far, seemed to start off so well, but for me it hasn't been good and I need to turn it around tomorrow.

Christmas Day

Well it Christmas Day and the best day of the year to have your family around year. This year that is what has happened for the first time for 24 months. It was a day I have been waiting for, because I love my children so much and I feel often I have let them down by not providing them with a normal family. What I thought I would do is provide pictures from the day to tell the story.

They say pictures say a 1000 words, and I hope these say even more than that. It been a lovely day, on the whole, and I'm just so glad that in the end that all the girls got to talk to their mothers. I feared that Lucy wouldn't get to but her mummy, but thankfully took up the offer and called her. All the girls are special and I just want them to be as happy as possible and see them as much as I can and give them a near normal life as possible. I love them all and I hope they know that whatever happens. The people I love are the most important people in my life.

I have a great day with the girls but I have a strange feeling about today. Something has happened and I'm not sure what. I just have a feeling in my soul something bad has happened that is not for the good. I'm just not sure what but it really affected the mood later in the day like some dark shadow that came over the day. May be I'm just tired, I don't know. Tomorrow is another day.

Happy Christmas

Just a very quick post to wish you a very happy Christmas where ever you might be. I hope you all have a wonderful day and may your dreams come true.

I know times are hard for everyone this year but I hope we can all forget our troubles and have a wonderful time. Happy Christmas everyone.

Love and peace to you all. Roy

The Day Before Christmas

Today was the day I have been looking forward too. The day when Lucy comes and the real start of the Christmas Holidays with all my girls here. I wish it could be like this every year for this is what Christmas is all about. It something I just love and this year it is going to be a reality. It is the way things are meant to be at this time of year.

After another restless night, and after I eventually fell into a deep sleep just before the alarm went off, getting up was the last thing my body wanted to do. Thankfully the mind is stronger and after a coffee I headed out to pick up my little Lucy from her mummy's. It was lovely to see her her again. I can't say how much I look forward to being able to spend time with her. It just makes the family feel more complete.

When we got home, and after popping to Melton pick up some lunch, Lucy instantly remembered her advent calendar. So after lunch she had nearly two weeks of little windows to open, which occupied Lucy and Catherine for a little while before they went off to play. Emily had gone Christmas shopping in the morning with her friends and she joined us in the middle of the afternoon with an armful of presents from her friends. She joined in the fun after put her presents under the tree, the first but not the last to appear there. It seemed a long afternoon, which Catherine remarked on. I guess it is that feeling of waiting for the big event, Christmas Day, that makes the day feel longer than it is. 

Dinner was simple but nice. With all the cooking to be done tomorrow I wasn't in the mood to cook anything lavish for dinner, and in any case I was tired from the lack of sleep the night before. All the same everyone was hungry and they seemed to enjoy it and I love having everyone around the table again. 

After dinner we all played and used up the time to until bedtime. Lucy went first and after her kisses and special cuddles she drifted off to sleep. I thought we might have a problem getting her off tonight and keeping her asleep. It seems that she had another bad cold that has affected her breathing a bit and then there is all the excitement of the the day to come. In the end she seemed to be sleeping like a dream when I went to bed. In fact it was Emily that had the problem getting sleep. She was the most excited.

I just hope that everyone has a lovely day tomorrow and nothing comes along to mess anything up. Christmas comes but once a year, and in my case every other year, and I want it to special all day and night long. It a special time that is full of love and joy and that is the way I want it to be. A great happy day.

Getting There

Well it is friday and one which I would normally have Lucy and the girls together, but this Friday Lucy is having an early Christmas Day with her mummy. I just hope Lucy is having a smashing time with her mummy. I know she will be getting loads of presents and love.

We are getting ready for Christmas and getting the food in. There is cleaning to be done and general tidying up here and there. Soon we will be ready for the holidays and I can't wait. After all the humbug moments in the lead up to the holidays, I'm really looking forward to tomorrow and what is to come. I just hope there is magic and good will in the air.

Travel Troubles

It looks like I will be doing more driving in future and as their mum poorly back might never really get better. The effect is that she now finds it increasingly difficult to drive without being extreme pain. What knock on effect this will have in seeing Lucy and how often Emily and Catherine can see their mum, especially over the winter, is unclear at the moment.

The cost of fuel is currently hitting me hard. I guess I will have an handle on that as we move into opening weeks of the year to come. The simple fact is I have to feed everyone and keep everyone warm and their is only so much money to go around.

The People Pay

While the Bankers and The Stock Brokers lived a life of bonuses based on a world of greed that never existed and the world seemed right. Well that is how the Government saw it, until the world financial markets crashed when the greed bubble finally burst and reality kicked in, and now look who is paying.

In today's autumn statement a the Government, which many people feel have lost control of the economy, was forced to acknowledge the hard facts, that greed has bleed the country dry and another recession is around the corner. The Government's own official independent forecaster, the Office of Budget Responsibility, have said this year had been the toughest on disposable household budgets since the end of the Second World War. It went on to blame this on rising food and energy costs, which have dented household spending plans. What it left out is that these rising costs have been caused by the Governments fiscal easing which is nothing more than a devaluation of the currency. The more the Bank England use this measure the more inflation and energy prices will rise. The fiscal easing has cost us dear already and means the pound in your pocket is worth less now than it was in the past.

We are all now paying for economic policy that started over thirty years ago with the mass sell off of the council houses and the right to buy. The government at the time invested the future of the economy into house buying and in so doing gave power to the banks. It helped create mood of buy now and pay latter and the banks provided the money to do this. It lead to unsuitable growth over the decades that followed with many of us borrowing money we couldn't afford to give back if hard times hit. When they did because of the banking crisis from over lending and high risking taking we find the bubble has burst and we are all in the mess that has been left behind it. So what is the governments solution now, affordable housing and more people borrowing money they might one day find they can't repay. It will just be another cycle of boom and bust. It might dig us out of a hole now until we fall into the next one.

Maybe the building industry can help us get thing back on an even path. Rents are high for people that can't afford to buy or can't take the risk of it all going wrong for them. Rents are high not because there is a shortage of houses to buy, it because there is a shortage of houses to rent caused by the governments policies of thirty years ago to sell off rented houses at cut down prices. What we need is house people can afford to live in without being having to be in debt for years to come because they owe some bank loads of money.  What is need is houses owned by the councils with regulated rents that brings the private sector rents down in line with peoples incomes. This has to be a gradual process, as over building  in the rented sector will just create another problem in the private rented sector who will need time to adjust to the change.

The government created a society built on investment built on property and borrowing to achieve that aim. What it needs to do now protect that which we have invested property in realistic terms while providing housing for people who need it a realistic prices. At the moment in the housing market we are all paying. House prices continue to fall and building more houses to buy will just drive prices down more as the market becomes flooded. This won't stabilise the markets but lead to a further booms and busts in the future.

However, that is just part of the picture with people incomes falling in real terms, virtually negative growth and more people losing there jobs every day, we are all suffering. We were given a dream by government some thirty years ago and this was reinforced by television to invest in property and borrow from the banks to achieve this. The reality is after today's budget statement, is that people will find there incomes compared to prices falling and there investments falling in value everyday. We are paying the price for greed of the past and an unrealistic dream that government wants to repeat.

Yes it is a time to be hard, because times are hard, but we mustn't repeat the mistakes of the past. The people are now paying for poor policy making. The credit free for all that was created at the time as been exploited by the risk takers in the banking industry which for years of being curious became reckless in their greed. What has happened is wrong and we are now all paying and will be paying and we will be feeling the pain for years.

Bloggers Block

It has been a well over ten days since I last wrote a blog post. I think like many Bloggers there are times when you just lose the desire to write because of other things in life that seem to take over. There can be for many reasons for this,  such as, simply not having the time to write, being preoccupied with other more important matters, or having so much going around in your head you just can think straight.

I know with the coming of Christmas I have had a lot on my mind recently. Some of which has been family related and other is just personal stuff. There has just been too much going on in my head and I haven't had the motivation or the energy to write and then there is the stuff that is just part of an on going frustration, even if the message is simple. It has all stopped me writing, and now I think it shouldn't have, but these things happen. Like many Bloggers I have taken a break, but hopefully now I am back.

So the plan now is to write the family related posts and catch up with those and if there is time fill in the gaps. I will start by finishing off the last weekend and events that followed and then the film of the week posts. There are notes and thoughts for all of these posts. If I ever finish the other posts that are just titles is any ones guess. There are still posts from November missing, some important and already written on paper, so it might be the case that they will be gaps that might never be filled. 

More Christmas Arrangements

Once again I have been offered the chance of having Lucy for longer just after the Christmas holidays. I do appreciate being thought of and being offered the extra time, but it was too late. The plans I had made as I said in a previous post, are too late to change at this stage.

I did try and ask for some more time after the new year, as I discovered the children in Leicester are off school for the week, but unfortunately that isn't possible as her mummy has taken time off work to be with Lucy and her sister. Lucy's mummy said she wanted to help, and that is good, but if she really wants to help then may be she can think of a way that I can see Lucy more without any more expense. The offer was kind, but not possible. All the same I know she will have a lovely time with her mum.

Peaceful Sunday

fThe Sunday after the sleep over was a peaceful one. Lucy woke Catherine up first thing and they both played for a while in Lucy's room before they decided it was time to wake me. Catherine and myself gathered her things and soon we were all downstairs watching television and having breakfast together as we woke up. 

The morning was like so many others on a Sunday in the winter when Lucy is here. It was too cold too go out so the play was mainly indoors. Catherine and Lucy took themselves off to the family room and I got on with cooking a roast lunch for everyone. Every so often I had a visitor in the kitchen seeing if she could help and if there was anything on offer to eat. Until I got to the carving Lucy was out of luck but it seemed as soon as the chicken came out of the oven she was there to eat some skin. During this time they were both joined by Emily who just fitted in with there games.

Sunday lunch was lovely, if I say so myself, and the evidence I have to back this up was the mainly clean plates. And with Emily and Catherine helping me with the dishes it was soon time for them to return to what they were playing before lunch until the rush began.

The rush as it becoming to be known is the last hour or so that Lucy is with us. During the morning I do all of Lucy's washing making sure her blanket and clothes are all clean and ready for her to go home. What is left to do is to make sure Lucy is in a similar state. This starts with her bath with the help of Emily and Catherine. This is followed by the drying of hair which Emily does with her as I gather her things and pack her bags. When that is done I return to Emily to get her dressed before leaving.

Then come the drive to the city. It something I will never get use to. I have read so many people, not in my position say it will get easier, those that are in my position say it never gets easier and in fact it gets harder. I side with the later, but it is something we do because we love our children. It was something I did today and I will do again and again. I do feel for all my girls living this life of two halves. I know I have said it before, but that is not what I wanted for any of them. I always wanted them all to feel they were part of a family and tried to make it so.

After Lucy was dropped off safely at her mummy's we returned home. Emily and Catherine got on with catching up with their friends on Facebook and I got on with making us all some dinner. After dinner the house seemed even quieter than normal. It had be a different weekend and I guess everyone need to just have some quiet time before it became time for the remaining girls to go to bed to be followed later by myself after a fun weekend.

The next time I will see Lucy and the girls will be together is for Christmas. I have Lucy for an extra night for the school holidays. Not what I wanted, but, that was all the time I could arrange to have them here together. I was offered more nights, for which I was grateful, but by then it was too late to change the plans I had made for the new year myself and the girls just after Christmas, which had been made when Christmas arrangements to see Lucy were made back in October. The time I wanted to see her at the end of the school holidays is the only chance her mummy has to have some time with Lucy and her sister without her work getting in the way, and since that was planned ages ago I can't see her then any extra, even though I feel I hardly see her. I do understand but it is hard for me.

The Next Day

The next day after the sleep over started when Lucy got up, at just before eight in the the morning. It was lovely to hear her knocking on the bedroom door and calling my name. This morning, she was a girl on a mission and that was to wake up all the people in the family room below. There was fun to be had and of course chocolate to be harvested from her advent calendar.

I followed Lucy downstairs with her things and after she had her chocolate she entered the family room. It was more like a large bed, rather than a room where the girls play, it was full of sleeping girls. It wasn't going to stay that way for long because Lucy carried out her plan to wake everyone up, starting with Emily, who she found and bounced on. 

While Lucy was busy, getting up the tired girls, I got on with cooking everyone, who was hungry a cooked breakfast. Nothing grand, just sausages, eggs, baked beans and toast and juice if they wanted it. With Emily, now awake, she took the orders as I dished up the food. Lucy, meanwhile, entertained all her new best friends as only Lucy can.

The morning was quite a contrast to the mayhem of the night before. The girls were all tired and much more subdued. They mainly either played with Lucy or they were on the computers putting pictures of the event on there Facebook pages and chatting with friends. There was a fair deal of gossiping to be done after the events and drama of the night before. It wasn't until mid morning that they started to leave and we were just left with the core group for lunch before they all headed into to town, to end what Emily billed as the event of the year.

With lunch out of the way and the house quite, other than Catherine and Lucy we all decided to get the shopping out of the way for the rest of the weekend. As it turned out it was a good thing we didn't leave it too late. When we got to the car we found we had a dead battery. Thankfully I managed to get it out, despite a very troublesome bolt, and located a neighbour with a charger. Lucy was fascinated by the charger and kept checking the needle on the meter to see if it was charged until I distracted her with some bubbles that drove her in to fits of laughter as George tried to catch them. This lead us into a afternoon of game playing and fun.

After three hours on the charger we were mobile again and the shopping got done. When we got home on went the dinner and soon that was all gone as the girls cleaned their plates. It was after dinner that the effects of the night before really started to show and we all crashed out on the mattresses in the family room and watched the remake of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It was one of those lovely peacefully moments where everything seems right. Lucy snuggled into me as we watched the film and it was a lovely family moment. 

Soon it was Lucy's bedtime and she was more than happy to head up the stairs. After a story form everyone and her kisses and cuddles, she went straight to sleep. It wasn't long tonight before she was followed by the the other two and soon the house fell quiet.

By all accounts all the people at the sleep over had a wonderful time and I know having them was a lot easier than I thought it would be in the end. I know Lucy loved all the attention and it was the nice the way they all included her and thought she was cute. I was glad they included Catherine too, I thought she would feel left out but she just joined in and had loads of fun.

Mayhem and Fun

Today was a little different from the normal day that Lucy comes to stay, for Emily was having her birthday sleepover, also there isn't many pictures of the day since I forgot to charge the camera. So the post for today will look a bit different from normal.

The start of the day was bright and sunny, but rather chilly so I took both Emily and Catherine to school in the car before going into town to get some petrol. This had the added advantage of not arriving home until the school rush at the village school had finished and ensuring I got a parking space for a change. As soon as I got back I had a quick coffee before heading out again, this time to get Lucy from the city and bring her back to the countryside.

It was a lovely morning for a drive and the roads were almost clear, except for the occasional horse rider enjoying a crisp sunny winter morning. I soon arrived at Lucy Mummies house and with Lucy in the car we headed back home. Along the way she chatted telling me her news making the journey back seem a lot faster than it did on the way there, although I drive a lot slower. It was lovely to see her again. I really do miss her.

When we got home Lucy went straight to find George and let him out of his cage and gave him a cuddle before giving him some breakfast. Then she settle down with me and we played for a while in the family room, had a few cuddles before heading out to buy some bread and eggs for lunch. Lucy wanted boiled eggs and soldiers, which use to be my favourite when I was her age, and something I had every morning before I went to school.

The afternoon was much like the morning. We had fun together but this time we managed to do some cleaning at the same time. I just made the whole thing fun and it seemed to work a treat. Most of the house was clean and the floors were washed, but the kitchen need some attention and that is what we worked on. It was more to do with emptying the dishwashers and cleaning the cooker and the sides than anything else, as Emily had done the floor for with me a few days earilier. Lucy was great at putting things away from the dishwasher then putting the dirty knives and forks in the the holder to be washed.

Lucy couldn't wait to see Emily and Catherine and when it came time to pick them up she was over the moon. As we headed out to the school I explained that we would only be picking up Catherine, as Emily was coming back later with Millie for a sleep over with her friends. She didn't seem to mind too much given we were getting Catherine who got a massive hug before we all headed off to the Tescos to buy some party food. We even popped into the Co Op were we met her cousin, because I had forgotten the drinks as we rushed around the other supermarket in town.

When we got home we didn't have long to wait until Emily turned up with Millie followed by more of her friends. Unlike the Co Op, were Lucy was hiding from her cousin, she instantly felt at home with all of them. She just went wild. It was lovely to see her not being shy and just being herself. It also allowed me to get on with the cooking as they all entertained her and she entertained them back with her ways. There was quiet a bit of food to cook for some very hungry mouths.

Once the food was cooked, into the kitchen came the girls to get their hot dogs, one by one, before heading to the dinning room table to add more food to their plates. It wasn't long before the food was gone and, with happy tummies, the fun began with girls all over the place making more noise than a herd of elephants marching through a field of bubble wrap. Lucy was loving all the attention and the noise. Soon she was joining in the games and making new friends. I sure loves the fact they all find her cute.

All to soon, for everyone it became time for Lucy to go to bed, but she managed to extract stories from all that were wiling to read her one, including her two bigger sisters. With her all storied out, one tired little girl finally gave up to sleep. It was a long after her head hit the pillow after her kisses and cuddles that she feel into the land of dreams, and thankfully was deaf to the chatter of the girls in the family room below her.

As the night wore on there were all kinds of dramas. It was like a early teenage version of Eastenders at one point. Thankfully it all seemed to sort it self out in the end and laughter replaced the silence and the serious talk and this went on until to bedtime when it became time to quieten them down. It was clear they wouldn't go straight to sleep, that was to much to ask for, and as I finish this post the girls in the family room are quietly chatting. I'm not sure what time the will finally fall asleep, but by all accounts of other sleepovers they go to this is nothing unusual. I know one thing that Lucy has a plan and two people, Emily and Millie, are going to be first up in the morning!

I have really enjoyed today, there was the odd feeling and the nervousness that is always present when I pick up Lucy, and the stress I felt when all the people arrived for the sleepover, but that is all now pasted. What I ended up was a feeling it has been a great day. It is lovely to have all the girls together and seeing them have so much fun is wonderful. It's not over yet, there is still the morning to come, but the sleepover went so much better I expected. I can just tell Emily has had a great time with her friends, Lucy has charmed them all and Catherine, who I thought might have been left on the outside just became part of the group. All in it has been a lovely day.

A Little Different

With it being the first weekend she has been here since her Birthday this week menu has a little twist. This weekend Emily is having a sleep over with here friends and that means we are going to have food for budding teenagers for one night this week.

Money is is still tight. and will be for a while to come, but this is what we have come up with for the week given we have some of the things we need in the cupboard:

• Friday - Hot dogs, sausage rolls, mini sausages, vegetable spring rolls, side salad and crisps.

• Saturday - Beef stew with sessional vegetables, dumplings and mashed potatoes.

• Sunday - Roast Chicken with sage and onion stuffing, roast potatoes, mash potatoes, carrots and garden peas.

• Monday - Mild Chicken Fajitas with a fresh crispy side salad

• Tuesday - Rogan Josh Chicken Curry, pillar rice, coriander and garlic nan bread.

• Wednesday - Pork loin chops with apple sauce, runner beans, sweetcorn and boiled minted potatoes.

• Thursday - Baked sausages, with roasted butternut squash and red onions, carrots and broccoli and mash potatoes.

I hope you are enjoying the menus and it is giving you an idea for some of your own meals. It is still helping us with the budgeting and the shopping. I know the girls are finding it fun and helps give them an input into what we eat.

Sleepless Nights

I have never been one to sleep for ten hours a niaght. That is just not me, but for years I have managed an average of seven hours of sleep. That changed a few years ago and now I have many a period of sleepless nights, and I have one of them now. There is just so much on my mind.

I;m not sure who really penned this poem but it somehow sums up the feeling of not sleeping and what you feel the next day.

Day Fades to Night

The darkness fades to shadow,

lights dim to black,

the world falls unconscious to the welcoming haze.

Yet here i lay eyes wide,

buttons at my finger tips,

for my mind consumed with thought,

refuses to surrender.

Hours slip away,

minutes miles before you,

until the shrill ringing forces you alert,

its time to face a new day.

Heavy eyes to guide you,

around on swollen feet,

the days merge together,

as you beg for a peaceful sleep.

Hopefully one day I will have day, upon day of restful sleep. I really don't know what will make my world right, but at the moment it all seems so far away. But, like they say, tomorrow is another day and who know what it might bring. If you believe enough and work hard enough may be then you can change things. Who knows, but tonight I just want to sleep and not wake until the alarm calls.

One of Those Days

You know it going to be one of those days full of little problems and frustrations when it starts off with the handle breaking on your favourite coffee mug. 

It was the coffee cup that Lucy the last time I got a present from her on Fathers day. I had been using it very day since then and it was very special to me. From then on in the day just seemed to be full of little problems and frustrations that just made it one of those days you would rather just for get. That was all compounded by not sleeping the night before with thoughts about the Christmas holidays rushing through my head and keeping me awake. It's not been a good day, and I just hope the evening is better.

Christmas at Gate's Nursery

Christmas is a special time, a time to put the past behind us, a time forget our troubles the best we can. There is no place more magical to indulge the Christmas experience than a trip to Gate's Nursery. The decorations and the colours are magical, as are the toys. Here is a few pictures from this years display.

It is one of the most magical places in the region to go to at this time of year. Children love it and adults too. What more it costs nothing to look and if you have ones as little as out Lucy then you can take them to Santa. Be assured they will have the time of their lives and get a present to mach the money you spend to see him. It is really wonderful.